I found this video of a wild european glass lizard last week. I’m becoming increasingly obsessed with it.

It moves like Dale Winton’s disembodied arm thrashing through a bush.

It looks like a penis that has been cursed by a witch.

When it starts to swim it looks a brown condom possessed by the spirit of a sea serpent.

It’s like a poorly designed anamatronic snake rallying against its programming.

I’m not a fan of the name European glass lizard. It doesn’t quite convey how different it looks like to other legless lizards. I’m going to champion a new name, possibly “The Blight”. I reckon that’ll envoke it’s sad eyes and anger at a cruel creator.

The Blight